


Not Alone

by Naril



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Force Bond (Star Wars), Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Not really romantic, One-Shot, Speculation, can be read like it, old story, sort of redemption
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-07
Updated: 2020-01-07
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:55:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22162174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Naril/pseuds/Naril
Summary: Ignores TROS because it was originally written last year.The force-bond shows Kylo Ren a vision he can't ignore. His position as Supreme Leader is not secure, Hux is plotting and his knights are not as loyal as he thought they are.
Relationships: Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren





	Not Alone

**Author's Note:**

> Unbetaed as always. 
> 
> I wrote this early last year after rewatching TFA and speculating with regards to Rey's vision on Takodana.

He knew there was talking. At times they forgot his powers. It would have amused him, only there were far more pressing matters.   
Such as his subordinates questioning him, wondering at his ability to lead. 

_There was blood soaking into the ground at his feet. His boots squelched as he stepped closer.  
“B-Ben…” Cracked lips breathed the name, a name he could not deny any longer, any more than her. _

_“Rey.” He managed past the lump in his throat and reached out a gloved hand to touch her pale cheek. There was blood crusting on her skin._

_She flinched but lacked the strength to pull back._

Hux had always been a problem. One he had meant to get rid off eventually but unfortunately he held the loyalty of a large part of the troops. They had all been loyal to Snoke and simple things that they were, had trouble adjusting to the change to the hierarchy.   
Hux had made sure that he was only seen as an Enforcer. An important one, true; but only an Enforcer who commanded the other knights. 

_His eyes travelled the length of her body laid out in front of him. He felt the darkness rising within him when he noted the gaping hole in her gut, the still smoking blaster wounds; one having scraped her shoulder, the other raw and open through the ripped and burnt fabric of her jacket just under her breasts._

_Her half of the bond flickered but he did not need that to tell him that she was dying._

_“Rey!” He crouched down, hand still hovering over her cheek. “Who did this to you?”_

Heads had rolled to prove to them all the power that endowed him with his new position but unfortunately Hux was too much of a weasel for him. He heard the whispers, knew the rumours and despite his lack of self-control at times (he was fully aware of this), he could not yet afford to get rid of the insufferable man. Captains, commanders, they all trusted him and not the mysterious Force that their Supreme Leader commanded. 

And then the General had done the unthinkable. He had secretly ordered a hit on his mother. 

Ren had managed to live in denial about his own failure back during the battle above D’Quar. He had not fired the shot that had ripped the bridge of the Raddus apart and he had not felt his mother pass into the Force so he had known she had lived. 

_“H-hurts…” Her doe-eyes were wide and filled with tears of pain though they never once left his gaze. Her hands scrabbled for the stab-wound._

_“Shhh.” He pushed them away. It was only bleeding sluggishly any more, her poking at it would only cause unnecessary pain. Instead he cupped her cheek again, hoping it would help her focus on him, though her gaze grew duller by the second. “Rey, tell me who did this.” He urged._

The force-bond with the scavenger had been quiet for months. At times he had reached out, others he had tried his hardest to sever the bond but all in vain. 

It was one of those times, when he had tried to undo what his master had created, that he felt it. 

One moment his mother’s presence had been a warmth in the back of his mind which he had been studiously ignoring and suddenly it was snuffed out. No pain, no warning, no screaming in the Force like when Hux had first activated Starkiller. She was simply gone. 

More than anything it felt so wrong for her to go like that. She had always been steel under silk. His mother had the quiet strength of several worlds inside of her, for her to leave this plane with no ceremony at all struck him more than he had ever imagined. 

It left him in shock, his mind unable to comprehend her loss. How could she be gone? She who had always fought so fiercely, she who had wielded the strength of the Jedi as well as the strength of a seasoned politician just as easily as she had that of a dangerous military tactician. 

He did not leave his chamber for days. 

It took weeks for him to be able to sleep again. 

_Some small spark returned to her eyes and she glared tiredly. “You d-did.” She whispered though this time she leant into his touch. “W-why, Ben? Why?” She mumbled, heavy-lidded gaze searching his darker one._

_He froze. “I didn’t.”_

When he received word through his spies (all rulers cultivated a multitude of them, another thing he had learnt from his mother) that Hux had ordered her to be targeted as the last high ranking Resistance leader, he nearly tore apart his flagship. The Finalizer only survived because he reached out and felt Rey’s soothing presence. For once, perhaps because her grief was so strong, he felt her again, could read her emotions again and felt a little less alone. 

They had sent an assassin after her. It had apparently been a clean shot, Hux enjoyed torturing him with details. Of course he failed to reveal the assassin’s identity. The First Order celebrated Hux’s success. Surely now they would destroy the remaining Resistance for once and for all. 

Meanwhile he plotted his own assassination.

_“You will…” She moaned as a shudder of pain ran through her small frame. Her breath hitched, eyes opening wider with a deep fear he had never seen in her. “B-Ben…?” She sounded like she was already far away. Then her eyes glazed over and she gave one last hitching breath before going limp, blank gaze still boring into his._

_“Rey?” He croaked, not wanting to believe the sight of her dilated eyes, her chest which had fallen silent and the snapping of the bond which was almost a physical sensation. It burnt his heart but he refused to accept it._

His reputation for being a dog was well deserved but he was also his mother’s son. He would bide his time. To keep his grasp on the First Order’s loyalty, the General’s death could not be traced back to him. Not now when Hux had just so publicly been victorious over their enemies. 

_“Rey!” He gathered her up with shaky hands, pulling her limp body into his arms only to find her growing colder and colder while her every limb dangled awkwardly like a puppet with it’s strings cut._

Yet before he could put any plans into practice, just when he had recalled his knights to the fleet, the dreams started. 

_Her weight only drove the pain deeper into his chest as he held her across his lap, unable to look away from her empty eyes. It was only when drops of water landed on her greying face that he noticed his tears. He could not feel them. His gloved thumb made it’s way to her blue-tinged lips, gently stroking the cooling but still soft skin. All too soon she would be stiff and waxy._

At first it was only glimpses of blood, of shots burning through the air. Sometimes he could see a battlefield soaked with torrential rain. 

_“Rey.” His voice broke._

Most of the time it was just her though. Her death as he watched on. 

_“I’m sorry.”_

Her injuries were always the same. 

_“I never wanted this.”_

At first he tried to ignore it. He knew the Force played tricks on it’s children. He no longer trusted them since he had been shown Rey by his side only for her to reject that future and leave him. 

The dreams returned every night. 

He tried not sleeping at all, dragging himself through days of relying on meditation and feeding on his pain (the dark side did not care if it was physical or not) to keep going but soon he heard more whispers. The Supreme Leader did not look well. Was he sick? Was he still capable of leading them? Should Hux take over? 

And Hux, well, the General was wallowing in his idea that he had broken Kylo Ren by killing his mother. He managed to pluck that thought straight out of his head despite his waning strength because he did not even bother to bury it deeper. Let him, Ren thought. He would soon be taken care of. His knights awaited his instructions. 

Except it never came that far. A hidden report reached him of a planned attack on a new resistance hiding hole. Once again without his authorisation. He would make the General’s death slow and agonising. 

When he returned that was, because he was already making his way to his ship. The planet was Kamino, an old relic of the Clone Wars but most importantly infamous for it’s many storms and heavy rain-fall battering the floating cities the indigenous species lived in. 

Everything made sense then. 

He had given everything to the Dark. 

It had taken anything he had not been willing to give. 

It would not take this. 

***

It was exactly like her vision except it was not. One of the black dressed warriors was missing. 

Rey could only stare despite the rain burning her eyes and soaking her to the bone. 

The knights were surrounding her. There had only been rumours about the knights of Ren and a part of her had hoped they had only been a myth but here they were, one looking more menacing than the other. 

She was alone, having separated from the others because she had felt a disturbance on the eastern landing platform. 

There were six of them. All with differing weapons and she felt herself taken back in time to the throne room and another group of faceless warriors. Back then there had been a reassuring presence at her back. This time, she would have to take care of them alone. 

She was not doing terribly, if she was being honest. Her lungs were burning but at least four of them had been eliminated. Two having fallen over the edge into the roaring sea, the other two having been dispatched with her rebuilt lightsaber. 

She backed further onto the walkway towards the gates, hoping that the narrower foot way would mean that they would not come at her all at once. Luckily, she was right. Only two came at her with their vibro-blades, the other staying back. 

Before she could worry whether this one was readying some unseen blaster, she felt it. 

It was a presence she had not felt in quite some time. 

It threw her a little and one of her opponents nicked her with his weapon. A shallow cut on her cheek, but it had been too close for comfort. Backing further away to give herself a chance to breathe, she was too distracted to notice that the third had apparently managed to silently somersault over the group of fighters. 

Only the vibro-axe did not connect with her stomach as it had been intended. In fact, there was no pain at all and a solid mass of dark fabric and muscle between her and certain death. 

For a moment all of them seemed to freeze in time. 

The red blade crackled to life and cut her would-be killer cleanly in two. She could not help but be reminded of another body, this one twisted and old, collapsing out of a black throne. 

The Force sang a warning and she turned just in time to deflect the other two, who though stunned by the appearance of their master and the fact that he had killed one of their own, started to press her again. 

They seemed shaken though and when she relieved one of them of his arm, the other dragged him away, activating a jetpack that she had not seen he carried. 

Only the softest tugging at the force bond stopped her from attempting to chase them. Turning, she found Ren still with his back to her as the lightsaber dropped from his hand, switching off only to clatter to the walkway. He was strangely doubled over and she was confused for a moment as to why he was not moving until his legs buckled. 

She was not quick enough. Lunging forward, she steadied him only as he collapsed, his knees impacting with the dura-steel beneath them. Despite the rain, she clearly heard him rasp in a breath before making an odd, tiny, strangled noise. 

“Ben?” She met his gaze only to find his deep, dark eyes glassy with pain. Then they both looked down to where his hand had instinctively cradled his middle. Even with the rain and the black of his clothing, the blood seeping thickly through a ragged cut in the fabric was all too apparent. 

He took another shaky breath and Rey watched as it only made more blood pour out, mixing with the rain and colouring the ground a sickening pinkish colour. 

She made to move forward to do something, perhaps put pressure on the injury, perhaps to hold him up as he wavered even on his knees, pitching forward a little. 

The roar of a jetpack and Ben’s eyes widening in terror was all the warning she received. Then he was on top of her, body jerking with the impact of two shots that had been meant for her or perhaps both of them, she would never know. 

His weight crushing her, she heard the muffled sound of Finn’s voice yelling and knew that he and Rose had rounded the complex, clearly having been alerted by the fight. She pushed the heavy body off of her, trying to be gentle about it, but he was so heavy and limp; frighteningly limp.   
She looked up only to see Rose steadying Chewbacca’s bowcaster and firing it with deadly accuracy at the remaining Knight who was struggling to stay airborne as it was with his comrade attached to him. They blew up in a flash of fuel, any remains splashing into the sea below. 

“Stay there, we’re on our way!” She then yelled at her, passing the weapon back to a mildy disgruntled looking Wookie. He never did like it when others took his weapons without asking. 

A rattling cough drew her attention to her unexpected saviour. 

“Ben!” 

He was shaking, lying on his back, soaked to the bone much like herself and lying in a quickly spreading puddle of red. 

Both shots had found their mark even if the first one had only grazed the top of his black sleeve, right under the scar she had given him herself. The other one was a steaming mess in his side, right in the lower ribs. The bloodied teeth he revealed as he tried to bite back a groan and the hitch to his shallow breathing only drove home the severity of the situation. 

Scrambling to his side, Rey immediately tried to put pressure on the still bleeding cut to his stomach only for him to cry out properly this time, as his spine bowed and he writhed on the ground that was soaking with his blood, the rain water turning the ground an odd pinkish grey. 

She tried and failed miserably to hold him down, his muscles seizing in agony and he was so much bigger than her after all. 

“Ben!” She called him, the bond soaring to life as she reached out in the Force for him too. There it was. She grasped the invisible strands and pulled some of his pain towards her, absorbing it, so he would no longer drown in it. 

At least, she tried to, until suddenly what felt like solid stone-gates slammed shut and she was thrown out of the connection. 

“N-no.” 

Her eyes flew open at the quivering voice. Immediately her eyes were captivated by his dark, pained pools. His mouth twitched into a grimace of a smile and his weak hand found hers where it rested on his gut-wound, already slick with his blood. “No… Rey.” He wheezed and swallowed what Rey knew with a sinking feeling was blood gathering in his mouth. 

His eyes never left hers, warm and unguarded as they took her in. “Rey.” He breathed her name again as if that was all he needed for her to understand. 

She did not understand; refused to accept it. 

“Ben, let me help you!” She implored, one bloody hand cupping his cheek. It felt clammy and she could not be sure if it was the cold of the rain or his injuries. He sighed and turned his head enough to kiss her palm. 

“I’m going to save you.” She whispered the promise despite not knowing if she truly could anymore. 

A soft, small smile grew on his trembling lips. “You already have.” 

***

“No.” Her voice was suddenly much firmer and he blinked heavy eyes open once more, perhaps feeling the Force flowing through her more vibrantly at her determination. 

Her hand moved to the back of his neck, lifting and shifting herself over so that his head rested on her knee. 

Then she placed her hands once again on the messy cut, blood still pulsing out of it with each shallow wheeze he took. Taking a deep breath, her eyes met his clouded ones as she focused on that well inside of her. 

Her eyes slid shut, she gathered as much of it as she could and perhaps a little crudely drove it into Ben’s injury. There was no time for finesse. Like this she could feel his body shutting down, his heart struggling for lack of blood, lungs straining to take in oxygen. 

She latched onto his cells, bending them to her will, making them reproduce more rapidly than they otherwise would have. She forced the platelets in his blood to clot around the bigger blood-vessels that had been ruptured. 

Having slowed the internal bleeding, she turned her attention to the punctured lung. The impact of the high powered blaster shot had broken a rib. It needed fixing or any help would come too late with his whole body already crying out for oxygen because of blood loss, organs beginning to shut down.   
She would have to move the bone back to where it belonged so it could heal properly. 

Her brow furrowed in concentration as she felt for the best way to bring it back to the natural alignment without causing the surrounding tissue any more injury. There. 

There was a squelchy snap, that would have sickened her if she had not been so focused on her task and the too large body in her lap convulsed, choking for air audibly. One of her hands found his forehead on instinct, brushing drenched black hair back in an attempt to soothe, though her eyes remained shut, trance unbroken. 

She coaxed the lung to repair itself much like she had done with the worst of the damage to his middle, feeling the drain on herself but not retreating, not yet. 

Gathering more from the well within her, she collected from her own reserves and poured it into their connection. The barrier he had erected was already crumbling with his failing strength and so she rather easily bypassed it. She meant to plant it and retreat but his force-signature, though flickering, seized the ribbons that flowed between them, clinging to her, perhaps out of a deep-rooted survival instinct. 

She held on with all that she had left as well, anchoring him, though she did not know how long she would be able to keep it up. 

_I’ve got you. Stay with me._

Some distant part of herself told her that her friends had arrived, struck dumb for a moment by the sight they presented. Their voices sounded confused then urgent but she was afraid to tear herself away, even to explain herself, even to make sure they were going to call for medics. 

_I’m here. You’re not alone._

The Force seemed to wrap around them both and though exhaustion was creeping up on her, she tried to guide it to strengthen their link. 

She felt him reach out too, his end of the link flaring. 

_Neither are you._

***

**Author's Note:**

> I was not sure whether to post this and initially thought that if I do it needs to be before the movie comes out. I decided to post anyway and I'm actually fairly proud how I got some little tidbits right that I was not expecting. 
> 
> It's not explicitly romantic because I don't think it has to be and even thought the kiss in TROS was a bit unnecessary for my tastes. You can have significant relationships between people without having them make out straight away. 
> 
> This is not me commenting on anyone's ship, this is just my opinion. Read into it however much or little you like, that's the beauty of being a fan.


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